It’s been a rough year, hasn’t it?
I mean the absolute mess that was 2020 has kind of spilled over into 2021 and it still feels like there’s a cloud of doom hanging over our heads, doesn’t it? Things *should* feel better, but they kinda don’t.
I think the problem is that we just haven’t been able to fully climb out of the pit. There’s still confusion and darkness looming over us.
Plus, the habits that we’ve slipped into over the past year and a half…well, they’re the kind of habits that are very, very hard to break. These habits have hijacked our happiness, pleasure, and joy…especially in the bedroom!
I know I’ve been indulging in a few too many sweets, exercising way less than I should, and letting negativity become my default operating system.
And then, once you’ve got these bad habits in place, it’s at least a bajillion times harder to take that first step and get back to good.
Which is why I’ve written this guide (it’s as much a reminder for me, as it is for you!)…
I’m thinking of this as my cheat sheet, my reminders of how to break out of a cycle of negativity, move forward into the light, and beef up my love life and pleasure. The truth is that many of us have put ourselves and intimacy on the back burner. Our love lives are hurting and our pleasure has taken a back seat to the new anxiety we are all feeling! But help is here and I’ve got some recommendations you can do RIGHT NOW to start feeling more loved, feeling more pleasure, and ease.
My go-to for the list of small steps you can take regularly to keep on the right path to your dream life, pelvic floor, and love life — the one that leads to vibrant health, happiness, and pleasure…no matter what the world is doing around you.
Adjust Your Mindset First
Your mindset is the underlying foundation for everything in life. When you’ve got your mind right, everything else flows from there. Even your love life gets better when you operate from a place of positivity, gratitude, pleasure, and true self-love.
But what exactly is mindset?
We hear this word getting thrown around a ton…and there’s never any clear definition or steps to take to create a positive mindset, right?
Well, part of that is because everyone’s limiting beliefs are different. There’s no one size fits all definition of negative thought patterns for everyone.
But, there are a few things you can do to immediately bring your mindset into a better place:
- Take action
It doesn’t matter if it’s a small action, or if it’s an imperfect action…but when you start to take the baby steps that are in front of you, it’s guaranteed to get you unstuck. Just keep doing something, putting one foot in front of the other. This creates momentum — and that keeps pushing you forward.
- Seek joy + pleasure
I know it seems like this may be selfish, but I promise you, following your joy will never steer you wrong. We were created to experience joy and pleasure. NOT to continually sacrifice ourselves and our dreams. I will have some specific ways on how to do this in my upcoming 5 Days to Better Intimacy Challenge which is open right now for enrollment.
- Eliminating negativity
Do you have people in your life that swat you down when you start to shine your light? Are you constantly reminded that you should play small and stay in your place? These types of influences on your mindset have to go. I know it’s hard to let go of the energy vampires in your life but maybe just maybe you will be better off if you surround yourself with people who make you laugh.
Movement
My Queen! Movement is so, so important! Even 10-20 minutes of movement a day can make a huge impact on your physical and mental health. And I know how hard it can be to get a fitness routine started again…but, oh, once you do…you feel so amazing. Like you can conquer the world. In the 5 Days to Better Intimacy, I will give you a full workout that we will do together in under 7 minutes. Trust me working out has NEVER been this easy and this workout will strengthen, toned, and tighten not only your body but also your pelvic floor. Imagine experiencing powerful orgasms that you swoon just thinking about them. This IS possible when you have your dream pelvic floor.
Sleep
Sleeping is so simple and yet so hard to do. But getting enough sleep is crucial for your overall well-being. When you skimp on rest, you’re compromising the strength of your health and your gut & vaginal microbiome and preventing yourself from feeling your best every day. I see many bad sleep habits, and the #1 thing that I did to turn myself into sleeping beauty was to turn off all my electronics 2 hours before bed. Now I read positive books that elevate my soul and well-being. This is just one tip. I will have many more in my challenge. Plus the bedroom is for love-making and intimate touch so that’s my new focus every night.
Diet
I’m not talking about restricting your calories and only eating salads here. But I am stressing the importance of a high-quality, nutrient-dense diet. I know take-out and fast food have been our only reprieve from cooking and about the only things we could do this year to get out of the house…but it’s time to start fueling our bodies the right way. With whole foods and plenty of anti-inflammatory ingredients. When you get right trust me your body is more ready for pleasure and joy.
Breathwork
It may surprise you how much I value breathwork as part of a healthy lifestyle…but Queen, let me tell you…breathwork is essential for women. Allowing yourself to fully expand the center of your being and filling your body with the life-giving air we breathe (with proper breathwork techniques) can change your life. You’ve probably never realized what it feels like to actually breathe the right way. Once you experience breathwork, you’ll never go back. I see so many women holding on to their breath and they’re not even conscious about it. This pattern increases anxiety and decreases our desire for pleasure. I recommend you just start noticing what is happening with your breath. Just notice.
Kegels — done the *right* way
Well, of course, you know that I’m a huge fan of Kegels and keeping your pelvic floor in tip-top shape. After all, as women, the pelvic floor is the foundation of our bodies. Without a strong foundation in place, we can’t be everything we want to be and we lack deep connections with our partners. Trust me I know this one first hand. And when your pelvic floor needs attention, it’s hard to focus on anything else. This is why I’m including Kegels on this list…make sure to show up for my 5 Day s to Better Intimacy Challenge where I will be teaching you the RIGHT way to do Kegels so you can have more sensation, less dryness, and feel stronger down there.
Join the 5 Days To Better Intimacy Challenge
One of the ways I’ve found to truly break out of old habits and patterns and truly move forward is to find a group of like-minded women who are striving for the same goals.
When we are surrounded by positive influences and the accountability that accompanies a group setting, magic happens.
For one, we find our motivation to make changes happen.
And then, we find the strength to keep going.
Which is exactly the kind of environment I’ve created in the 5 Days To Better Intimacy Challenge.
It’s a 5-day, quickstart program to turn your love life and everything else around and get back on track to feeling more pleasure and taking care of your sacred anatomy the RIGHT way!
Inside, you’ll find easy, practical ways to take those small, imperfect actions that will set your success on fire.
You’ll have an amazing group of women to support you and share wins with.
And you’ll have me, leading you through the whole process, with live workshops (that are recorded in case you can’t make it live), prizes to give away, and a big, beautiful life waiting for you at the end of 5 short days.
Interested in learning more about how to create new thought patterns, establish new healthy habits, and get your pelvic floor rockin’ again?
